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By Larry Flynt

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Of course," acknowledged the health care professional. He then wrote out a prescription, which Mr . DiMaggio stuffed at the manner domestic. regrettably, the pharmacist made a mistake typing the label, writing 3 tablespoons in tead of 3 teaspoons a the day-by-day do age. whilst Dr. Jone received to hello place of work the following morning. his cellphone wa ringing off the hook. It used to be a frantic Mr . DiMaggio. "What' flawed? " requested the surgeon. "Didn t the drugs paintings? " "I'll say it did! " she cried. "He s jumped e ery lady at the block, and now he' s chasing a cat down the treet! ' 86 HUSTLER ' S DIRTIEST JOKES 189 The HusTLER Dictionary defines coin-operated robotic hookers as: slut machlnes. one hundred ninety After spending a lively evening with a hooker, the senator took $300 out of his pockets and set it at the inn nightstand. "Thanks, yet I merely cost $20," the lady acknowledged. "Twenty money for the complete evening? " the incredulous flesh presser requested. "You can' t most likely make a residing on that! .. "Oh, do not worry," she purred. "I do some blackmailing at the aspect. " 191 Q: Did you listen in regards to the hillbilly who left his property in belief for his spouse? A: She cannot contact it until eventually she's thirteen. 192 The minister was once ailing, and a pastor famous for hjs longwinded sermons agreed to fill in. while he stood up within the pulpit, he came across in simple terms 4 churchgoers current. HUSTLER'S DIRTIEST JOKES 87 in a while, he complained to the sexton. "That was once the smallest turnout i have ever seen," he stated. "Weren't they expert that i used to be coming? " 'Nope," responded the sexton, "but in some way note needs to' ve leaked out. " 193 A touring salesman accomplished his journey ahead of expected and despatched his spouse a telegram: "Returning domestic Friday. " Arriving domestic, he came upon his spouse in mattress with one other guy. Being a nonviolent individual and a big wimp, he bitterly complained to hjs partner's father, who responded, "Don't get so dissatisfied. i am yes that there has to be an evidence. " tomorrow the partner's father was once all smiles. "I knew there has been an explanation," he expert his sonin-law. "She did not get your telegram! " 194 A fearful husband advised the wedding counselor, "I'm afraid i am wasting my wife's love. " The counselor requested, "Has she began to overlook you? ' The husband acknowledged, "No, she's as attentive as ever. 88 HUSTLER'S DIRTIEST JOKES She meets me on the door with a chilly drink and a hot kiss. My shirts are consistently ironed. She chefs the meals i admire, she retains the home neat and fresh, she makes the youngsters remain out of my hair, and she or he even shall we me decide on the television courses we watch. Our intercourse existence continues to be pretty much as good as ever, and he or she by no means gadgets to kinky stuff or says she has a headache. ' "Then what do you think that is inaccurate? " exclaimed the counselor. His sufferer answered, ''Well, possibly i am simply being overly delicate. yet at evening, while she thinks i am dozing, she places her lips up on the subject of my ear and whispers, 'Die! Die! You son of a complain! ' " 195 The H usTLE R Dictionary defines Mexican Superman as: a man who can scouse borrow the tires off flying airplanes. 196 completing his ready statemen t, the blustering flesh presser threw his press convention open for questions.

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